What Parents Fail To Understand.

Altruism is the principle or practice of unselfish concern for or devotion to the welfare of others. I can’t think of a better term to associate with parents. Everything they do is for the sake of their children. Their entire happiness revolves around their children and making sure that they are as happy as possible disregarding their own comfort.

We’re always told that too much of anything is bad. I can’t help but concur with it. It’s a fine line between being caring and being possessive, protecting and suffocating, guiding and demanding. More often than not parents fail to differentiate between these. They fail to realise that their children grow up and stop being children. And that they can make their own decisions and at times it will be different. Expecting them to follow whatever you say when they’re fully grown adults with their own thoughts is not going to end up well. 

From education to marriage, parents have a lot more say than they should in my opinion. I don’t remember being asked if I wanted to do engineering. It was sort of decided for me. I’m just glad that whatever I wanted to do aligned with whatever they wanted me to do. I can understand this to an extent though. We’re still young and they are afraid that we might choose the wrong path. But there’s absolutely no reason to be as involved in deciding who we are going to marry.It is shocking that they believe they know who the best person for me is better than myself. Either that or they want me to marry someone who suits them as well which is equally shocking. 

You have to trust me that I’m capable of deciding who I want to spend the rest of my life with. You should trust me whether I want to have children or not. Or at what stage of my life I should have them. I don’t want you to force me into doing what you think is “right”. People are different. People like different things and have different preferences. It shouldn’t be a surprise that I don’t want to do the same thing which you did or which my brother did. I don’t even think along the same lines as some of my best friends who grew up with me. It logically doesn’t make sense that you will know what my preferences are and who I will like better than myself when we’re a whole generation apart.

I am a firm believer that I reap what I sow. I will face the consequences of my decisions. Am I perfect? No. Will I make some mistakes? Absolutely. Let me make them. At the end of the day, I will learn from them and face the consequences. I will have no one to blame but myself. I will ask for help when I need it. I would have the satisfaction of doing whatever I felt right even if I make mistakes. I don’t want to think about the what if and what could have been questions after being forced into doing something. 

It's needless to say that I'm extremely grateful for everything my parents have done for me. I don't take anything for granted but I do wish some things were different than what they are.