RANT: I hate it out here.

 I wake up every single day to this monotonous life of doing absolutely nothing. Living through each day not knowing why I am doing what I am doing. What is the point of all this? How long will I do this for? I envy the people who have a goal. An ambition which propels them forward. Meanwhile I am just going through the motions day after day in a robotic manner without any sense of purpose. I'm stuck on this treadmill of existence with no finish line. Is this what the rest of my life going to be? Being locked up in my room working for 9 hours a day without speaking to anyone or seeing anyone typing away on my laptop. And the funny thing about all this? This is the BEST PART OF MY DAY. HOW THE FUCK IS MY WORK THE BEST PART OF MY DAY????? Work keeps me occupied. There's a goal. There are tasks which need to be completed. I have no time to think about anything else and I can focus on doing something which I relatively like. And I get to talk to people. Even if it is 30 seconds of me sharing the status of my work, I have someone who is listening to what I say and I am having a conversation. I can push through the weekdays exhausting myself during the day from work and going to sleep early but I hate the weekends. I sit there on Friday evenings shutting off my laptop and not know what the hell I'll be doing for the next two days. I can't wait for tomorrow. This rant is the culmination of me sitting in my room for 3 days straight. A merry fucking Christmas to me. YAYYYY. But I'll be fine tomorrow. Once I wake up and the routine kicks in, everything will be back to normal. Normal indeed. Whatever that is supposed to be. I know what a lot of you are probably thinking. This is nothing new and I am just whining about stuff which probably everyone goes through. Believe me, I tell that to myself every day. Stop whining and get on with it. It's 2AM in the morning and I don't think I am thinking straight. Maybe I'll regret this in the morning. But I just can't be arsed at the moment. 

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